READ AROUND THE RAINBOW ~ The First Story I Ever Wrote with an Eye Toward Publishing #RAtR

It’s the last Friday of the month and you know what that means! It’s ᖇEᗩᗪ ᗩᖇOᑌᑎᗪ TᕼE ᖇᗩIᑎᗷOᗯ time!

٩(θ ‿ θ)۶

This month’s topic is…

The First Story I Ever Wrote with an Eye Toward Publishing…

The first story I wrote intending it to be for publication is not the same story that was actually published first. The first published was a short story titled Cow Pie Bingo, followed by eight more short stories. Reworked/reedited versions of those are all included in my collection, Snapshots.

The first written was long-novella length, titled A Dream Come True. That one has since been overhauled to such an extent it merited a new title when it was republished, short-novel length, as Closets Are for Clothes.

A Dream Come True was told in 3rd-person-past alternating POVs. Closets Are for Clothes is 1st-person-past single POV. Oddly enough, my first draft of the original story was 1st-person-present and I no longer remember if it was in more than one POV or not.

Although the overarching storyline is the same, quite a bit changes regarding some side characters and about how things play out when Mike goes back to Kansas to come out to his family. I think the most significant change, though, was nine extra years of writing experience and learning how to better “show” rather than “tell” at the phrasing level. Judge for yourself:

The original book started with a short bit from Wes’s POV before switching over to Mike. Here’s that first bit from Mike’s POV:

Mike’s first two roommate prospects hadn’t been very promising. He was not going to live with a stoner, and just knew he’d be nuts within a week if he accepted the chatterbox.

He was listening to Paul Simon sing Me and Julio Down by the Schoolyard when his third and final interview for the day knocked on the door. He plastered a friendly smile onto his face and opened the door.

Here’s how the reworked story opens (Mike’s POV):

Chat up a telemarketer—that was one thing I’d rather do. Or engage in a conversation with someone handing out religious tracts on a street corner. Maybe ask that burly guy with the perpetual frown at the Express Lube to help me out with a little manscaping. I shuddered. No, maybe not that one.

Point being, there were plenty of things I’d rather do than face another roommate interviewee. I missed Amber already. I even missed the side-eyed squint she’d leveled in my direction whenever I’d left the toilet seat up.

I hit PLAY on the iPod attached to the stereo, and Paul Simon’s vocals rang out as he sang “Me and Julio Down by the Schoolyard.” My head bopped to the beat as I approached the sliding glass balcony door to stare down over the parking lot.

The immortal words of Thomas H. Palmer came to mind. “’Tis a lesson you should heed, try, try again. If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.” I’d be willing to bet Mr. Palmer had never endured a new roommate search culminating with a guy who didn’t think anything of showing up to the interview stoned out of his mind, or tried to politely extricate himself from a non-stop chatterbox who either couldn’t or wouldn’t pick up on clues it was time to leave. At least the homophobe hadn’t wasted any time clearing out.

Maybe my writing from more than a decade ago isn’t entirely terrible, but I like to think that my current efforts make for more enjoyable reads.

I do like the original cover, though. I like them both:

Am I the only one who shudders when reading examples of their earliest efforts? Probably not. I’m glad I’ve had the opportunity to overhaul and republish those early works.

I’ve still got two old stories that are out of “print” waiting in the wings for their overhauls. The follow up to Closets Are for Clothes featuring Mike’s uncle is one that I’ve been pondering for a while, trying to sort out the updates it needs. I think I might have that worked out now, so that might be my next (long overdue) project.

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WEBRING ~ Read Around the Rainbow!

Be sure to flip through the webring to read your favorite authors’ takes on this topic! For your convenience, here are direct links to the other WebRing participants’ posts for this month’s topic:

Read around the Rainbow

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