Through My Own Lens
Mickie B. Ashling © 2017
All Rights Reserved

Chapter One

Lowering his camera, Ian Carmichael squinted across the divide of harsh lights and eviscerated me with one question. “Do you always look like this, or did someone come in your mouth without your permission?”

Stunned by the unexpected attack, I struggled to catch my breath while deliberating my next move. I could throat punch the asshole—and get on the blacklist—or choose the high road and keep my dignity intact.

“Don’t just stand there, Red. Answer me when I ask you something.”

My pulse sped up, and I was tempted to walk out the door, but that would only prove I was an incompetent newbie. I decided to tough it out, but not until I had my say.

“First off, my name is Chyna Davidson, not Red, and you might consider rephrasing your question.”

Instead of backing down, Ian challenged. “What the hell kind of name is Chyna anyway?”

“Not that it’s any of your business, but my mother was a fan of Wilson Phillips.”

“Who?”

“Forget it.” Clueless motherfucker.

“Listen up, kiddo. Once you’ve attained supermodel status, you can patent that insouciance, but at the moment, you’re nothing but a wannabe. Start making love to my camera or find another career.”

“Sorry?”

“Jesus fucking Christ!” Ian roared. “Pretend I’m your boyfriend and you’re craving some attention.”

Ooh, that did it. Yelling had never worked with me, and unfiltered words projected out of my mouth like vomit. “Dude, I have a boyfriend, and he gives me plenty of attention. And just so we’re clear, I’m not your bitch, so get over yourself. Fame doesn’t give you the right to be a first-class prick. You. Chose. Me. Stop acting like a bully and tell me what to do without insulting me.”

“Give me a goddamn break.” Ian turned his back and reached for one of several bottles of water he kept on the table piled high with camera lenses and filters. He drained the liquid in a few gulps while I stared at his backside, which, I had to admit, filled his faded jeans rather nicely. The world-renowned photographer, who’d begged for a fresh face to represent Armani’s next spring collection, knew damn well what he was getting when he requested my presence. I never said I was experienced, and instead of treating me with compassion, he was being an utter jerk.

Ian hollered for Melinda, my agent, who appeared at his side within seconds. She and her husband, Dan, owned Elite Plus, the Chicago-based agency who’d first discovered me.

“What’s the matter?” she asked, rubbing Ian’s back gently.

“Do something with your boy or get me a replacement.”

Hell no. I gnawed at my lower lip, terrified by the prospect of being fired on my first day of work. Ian was the most famous photog in Manhattan, the best of the best, or so I’d been told, and he wasn’t too hard on the eyes if one was into silver foxes, which I wasn’t, but that was beside the point. Making a good impression was the right move if I hoped to conquer the fashion world, but so far, this meeting had been a disaster. Ian tossed the empty bottle into a recycling bin and continued to glare at Melinda.

“I’m aware you have a deadline,” she conceded softly, “but honestly, Ian, a little sugar would go a long way to make this easier on our collective nerves. You wouldn’t have asked for Chyna if you didn’t believe he had potential.”

“I don’t have time to babysit,” he snapped.

“No one’s asking you to feed and burp the guy,” Melinda argued. “Chyna’s a natural, but he doesn’t know you or what you’re hoping to achieve. You’d get a lot more cooperation if you encouraged rather than criticized.”

“My God, woman! Do you have any idea how long it’s been since anyone asked me to adjust my attitude? I’m not the one with a problem. It’s your brat who needs a swift kick in the ass.”

I could feel my anger—and humiliation—rising again. My hands curled into fists as I got ready to punch Ian’s lights out.

“You’re the one acting like a diva,” Melinda shot back. “Chyna’s a hard worker with a lot of potential star power. It’s up to you to unleash the magic, not snuff it out with your craptastic posturing.”

Ian’s mouth gaped. I wondered how long it would take security to escort us out of the studio, and I was surprised—honestly flabbergasted—when it didn’t happen.

“Okay,” Ian agreed, backing down. “I’m willing to give this another chance, but I want to see more sass and less pouting.”

Nodding, Melinda acknowledged his request with a curt “Got it.”

She covered the short distance between us in a few determined strides, and I braced for whatever was coming next. Mel was fired up, willing to go the extra mile to ensure my success, but the responsibility now rested squarely on my shoulders. If I didn’t live up to her hype, I might as well pack it up.

My family would probably be relieved if I walked away, but Mel’s reputation was on the line, and I owed her big-time. When I walked into Elite Plus four years ago, I’d been passing for female, due in part to being born intersex, but mainly because of my mother’s irrational desire to have a daughter. Against all medical advice, and despite my fully formed male genitalia, she’d been raising me as a girl. Mel had seen through the charade and gently coaxed me into becoming my authentic self. She was more than my agent—she was my mentor and best friend. I couldn’t let her down after she’d put her reputation on the line for me.

“What an asshole,” I muttered. “He’s obviously too full of himself to mentor anyone.”

“I won’t deny it,” Mel whispered, “but Ian’s very much in demand. You’re lucky to be here.”

“Seriously?”

“Hon, you’ll have to trust me on this.”

“Any suggestions?”

“Put some enthusiasm into your smiles,” she began, “and own your beauty.”

“Sorry, but it’s difficult when he acts like I’m a waste of time.”

Mel gave me the look she usually reserved for gossipy tidbits. “He’ll never admit it, but I know Ian finds you attractive, and that’s a big plus right there.”

“How can you tell?”

“His nostrils flared when we walked in.”

Thank you for hosting my blog tour and giving me an opportunity to talk about my latest release. Through My Own Lens is the fifth book in the Horizons Series, but catching up isn’t necessary. This new story can be enjoyed as a standalone.

As the blurb mentions, my main characters, Luca Dilorio and Chyna Davidson, have just graduated high school and are headed east to start a new chapter in their lives. Being away from home for the first time can be exhilarating, but it also presents challenges neither one anticipates.

To celebrate the release of Through My Own Lens I bring two gifts to make your holiday season a little brighter. One lucky winner will receive a $25.00 NineStar Press Gift Certificate and the other will get to choose one e-book (excluding Through My Own Lens) from the NineStar Press catalog. Before I go, I’d like to thank Lori at IndiGo Marketing for her excellent work in organizing this book tour.

Tell us about Luca and Chyna

I created Luca Dilorio back in 2o11 when he showed up as a six-year-old in my novel Taste. He quickly became a fan favorite. Since then he’s appeared in two more novels, Daddio and Chyna Doll. Now my book baby is nineteen and going off to college. Like most parents, I’m torn between pride and fear. He’s had an easy life so far and has weathered many challenges under the watchful eye of his fathers. Now he’s on his own for the first time and I can’t help worrying. Will he be able to cope as new situations arise or fall into a sinkhole like a lot of freshmen?

Chyna Davidson came on the scene in 2015 when Chyna Doll was released. I’ve always liked the name Chyna—in all its spelling variations—and wanted my first intersex character to have a name that was beautiful and unique. Chyna also deals with the unfamiliar as he embarks on a modeling career. Like most stage moms, I’m hovering in the background and wringing my hands. Chyna is remarkable in so many ways, but he’s been through a lot.

Character Bio – Luca

Luca was raised by gay fathers and grew up with unconditional love and support. He’s been the “golden” boy for years, dutifully following rules, and excelling in school and sports with hardly any effort on his part. At Cornell, he’s just another freshman, facing daily challenges and learning how to cope without his usual support system. Being apart from Chyna for the first time since they became a couple is turning out to be more difficult than he ever imagined.

Character Bio – Chyna

Chyna’s earlier years were clouded by doubt and insecurity due to his mother’s irrational behavior. Born intersex, Chyna is a fully formed male with some internal female organs. Going against all medical advice, Lisa Davidson raised Chyna as female. Things began to unravel when Chyna hit puberty and fell in love with Luca. After overcoming so much, Chyna is finally pursuing his dream, and embarking on a modeling career.

What would the fans want to know about Luca beyond the basics?

Luca is a control freak and struggling to let go.

What would the fans want to know about Chyna beyond the basics?

Chyna has made tremendous strides with regards to his gender dysphoria, but the psychological wounds are still fresh, and taunt him when he least expects it.